Monster Blurbs - Vol. 3

BLACK FRIDAY (1940)

Marquee Chimps - Vol. 3

Tune your radio dial to 95.3 FM!

Monster Blurbs - Vol. 2

THE THING WITH TWO HEADS (1972)

Behind Them Scenes: THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT (1972)

THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT
Hallmark/American-International, 1972
Directed by Wes Craven
Starring David Hess, Jeramie Rain and Fred Lincoln

Marquee Chimps - Vol. 2

$2 per car load!

Monster Blurbs - Vol. 1

In the grand tradition of those great monster parodies of  the past (such as Cracked magazine's "Monster Party" and the "Monster Laffs" series of trading cards), comes this series dedicated (in love and jest) to our beloved cinematic ghouls of day gone by.

Without further ado, the first entry...

BLACULA (1972)

Marquee Chimps - Vol. 1

Starts Friday!

Behind Them Scenes: GET CARTER (1971)

GET CARTER
Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, 1971
Directed by Mike Hodges
Starring Michael Caine

DON'T eat the Jell-O pudding!

The porn industry has always been known for cashing in on a craze whether it be film or television related, but in recent years, there seems to be a major movement in creating such parodies. While, I haven't seen any of these, I can't help but be amused by both their audacity and creativity (so to speak) and one look at their cover art usually provokes a good laugh. It's as if The Asylum had an "adults only" wing.

This particular film, NOT THE COSBY SHOW (XXX) sparks the most interest in terms of taboo, since Bill Cosby would be outraged and, as much as I respect Cosby, that strikes me as pretty damn funny.

From the looks of this trailer, kudos to the cast and production for actually trying to make a worthwhile clone, porn or not.



Finally, Bill Cosby can detest another filmmaker after almost having an "ANGEL HEART attack," back in the late '80s, thanks to the great Alan Parker.

While we're at it, why not make LEONARD, PART 69?

Happy Mel Brooks Day!

Mel Brooks turns 85 years young(?) today. What better way to celebrate than by watching one of my favorite Mel Brooks films? Well, I don't feel like it, really, on account of my watching one last week, unaware of his upcoming birthday, so I'll just pretend that I just watched it today.

That film being SILENT MOVIE, which like another of my faves (HIGH ANXIETY) is hugely underrated. Here are a few of my favorite captured visuals (oddly enough, none of which are from my favorite scene, the "Melon balls!" sequence with James Caan)...

FINIS

Television Goodies: Franklin & Bash

Rarely do I stick with watching a television series on a weekly basis, but stumbling upon this slightly askew courtroom drama on the night of it's premiere episode turned out to be a damned good thing. I didn't even know about it's existence, much less who was in it, but it feels like one of those shows that was made specifically for people like me. By people like me, I mean those who like Mark-Paul Gosselaar (yes, I was a SAVED BY THE BELL fan), Breckin Meyer (who I have liked since FREDDY'S DEAD: THE FINAL NIGHTMARE), the always gorgeous Garcelle Beauvais, the great Malcolm McDowell and my latest crush (who has both HOT and CUTE down to a science if you ask me), Dana Davis.



Aside from a great cast, it's a well-written, fun series and I definitely dig the McDowell nods/decorations in the "man cave" (posters for BLUE THUNDER and A CLOCKWORK ORANGE on display). And, it definitely doesn't hurt if there's a Jean-Claude Van Damme reference within the first ten minutes of the first episode either.

Embedding has been disabled for this video, but here's the link to a set visit with Malcolm McDowell...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XU6HXBvp8X0

Wednesday nights on TNT @ 9/8 central.
I hope this one sticks around.

Ending on a good note, here's some more Ms. Davis...

And, I never thought I'd say this, but I suddenly have an interest in that PROM NIGHT remake...

Family Movie Night

"Hey, kids! Who wants some hot buttered popcorn?!"

Another Movie Tie-In Project: Odds 'n' Sods

Quite enough time has passed since the last tie-in entry and I'm due for a fifth installment of the video series, so here it is...



Yet another collection of movie tie-ins in the form of paperback books, magazines, movie programs, comic book adaptations, screenplays, retrospectives and more. (Lots of Star Trek, James Bond and Star Wars in this one ...with a dash of Lucio Fulci.)

THE END?

Kintner Prunes

Without a doubt, I absolutely love me some JAWS and I'm a sucker for all the lovingly inspired knock-offs from that era. Having just discovered another fan made JAWS homage (shot in splendid Super 8mm) on YouTube, I figured it was time to make a post to showcase that film along with another which is currently available on the site.

First up, is a Swedish take on the formula from Nässjö Filmverkstad entitled HAJEN...



And, on the same glorious program...
A rather enjoyable offering from Frank Wied entitled SHARK...



Speaking of JAWS on Super 8, here's another great find...
(Dig that terrific Universal 8 logo!)



Want a pretzel?

Yahoo Bid Adieu

Long before this blog, I used to contribute to several groups that I created on Yahoo.  Most of which dealt with honoring actors that, in my opinion, don't get enough accolade (the most successful of these groups being The Donna Wilkes Appreciation Group), but over the years, I've distanced myself from the process thanks to the siege of fun on Yahoo due to killer spambots and other types of trolls, and also, with the emergence of more popular groups/pages on MySpace and Facebook.

Since some of these groups (okay, really all of my groups) have been cricket fodder for years now, and after receiving a fake "Hey, we're billing your credit card" e-mail this evening via some spammer on one of the groups, I decided it's finally time to put a few of these to rest.

The Daniel Bernhardt Fan Archive

Last Member Count: 131

Created on June 29, 2002

Ended on March 29, 2011

The Robert Carradine Multiplex

Last Member Count: 36

Created on March 6, 2002

Ended on March 29, 2011

The Craig Wasson Tribute Group

Last Member Count: 17

Created on January 3, 2003

Ended on March 29, 2011

For the longest time, I felt that, along with my other group contributions, that these should remain online for the sake of posterity.  But, since posterity isn't even interested, anymore
...well, it's time to call it a night.

I still love all of these actors, but, over the years, some of the "fans" that I've encountered have truly taken the "wind out of the sails" so to speak.  For example: Elena Erro, who stole nearly all of my content from the Robert Carradine group for the sake of his/her (still unsure) "tribute site" and some know-it-all French woman on another group (her name escapes me) whom I never got along with.

So, if you see those dead links lying on the floors of IMDB or any other site, just walk on by. It was (sorta) fun while it lasted.

Even More View-Master Dreams

More View-Master Dreams

And, the beat goes on.

A few more reels that never were, but should have been...

View-Master Dreams

The beginning of my View-Master obsession in '79.

It's been ages since I've posted on here, so I figured if I'm going to post something, it should be worthwhile.  (Please accept this "excuse for a post" as a fine replacement for "worthwhile.")

Growing up, my favorite toy of all was View-Master.  I had (and still have, thank you very much) tons of these three-reel sets devoted to movies, television, theme park attractions, cartoons, events, et cetera.  They sure don't make them like they used to and I always wished they'd make 'em like they never did before.

So, I've decided to create some fantasy vintage artwork for View-Master reels that never were.  In some cases, some of these titles never would have been considered, but fortunately, I'm demented enough to consider them.

Here's the first wave...

Jane Russell (1921-2011)

You were a true class act.  Rest in peace.

ElecTRONica

Typically, I have a superstition about listening to a film score prior to seeing the film in question.  But, there is that temptation of listening to something with the purest mindset, uninhibited with the eventual marriage of imagery.  Such is the case with Daft Punk's score for TRON LEGACY, of which I have been quite excited about since learning the news of this collaboration.  Seemed perfect.

My impressions of the score...
First of all, I read a review (I know, why bother?) which basically said that this orchestrated score gives us very little of what we love about Daft Punk.  Well, that person is clearly of the moronic persuasion and it seems they've missed the point.  Composing a film score is certainly new ground for Daft Punk and if the likes of Danny Elfman and Mark Mothersbaugh can do so successfully, why can't these Frenchmen?

So, I popped the disc in (TRON-style, yo!) and while I dug the sound of the first track, "Overture," it was the second track, "The Grid" (featuring narration by the great Jeff Bridges), which literally gave me chills and immersed me in the TRON experience instantly.  I am so ready for this film!  Daft Punk has succeeded here by tapping into the TRON vibe (without stealing from Wendy Carlos' score to the original TRON) and, above all else, accomplishing what every film score should by transporting your imagination to another world, one that is beautifully filled with strains of triumph, romance and despair.

The style they're known for can be heard on both "End Of Line" and "Derezzed" (with the former supplying some welcome ATARI-era gaming sounds).  Throughout, I'm impressed with how much this album brings to mind the pulsating, electronic drive of John Carpenter's earliest scores.  In fact, I'd describe it as Carpenter meets Vangelis, backed by a full orchestra.  Beautiful work indeed and, best of all, it does the trick.

On with the show!